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Bark Mitzvah at dog laundry

Only in America… this ad for a “Pet Laundrette” claims it can meet all a pet-owner’s “Bark Mitzvah Needs”!

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ANT KATZ

Sarah, a regular user and contributor who lives in the US, couldn’t help sending the Jewish Report a copy of an advert she saw on Monday. “I’m out in Portland this week and saw this ad in the local Jewish Life Oregon magazine,” she e-mailed. “I’m not sure whether to laugh or cry. Hashem should be more important to us.”

Sarah offered that she had “kept the mag, and can probably get a better photo/scan when I’m home later today. Shavua tov.”

“Yes, please!” was our immediate responds. This was just the type of story we were looking for to kick off our new website’s content section called Our Whacky Jewish World.

True to her word, Sarah duly scanned and sent us the Jewish Life Oregon advert. SEE IT BELOW STORY or DOWNLOAD PDF which we have put on SAJR.co.za so you can save or print it – and even e-mail it to your family and friends. “I know it is tongue in cheek,” wrote Sarah today, “but nevertheless it does leave me a little speechless… kippah and tallis seems a little sacrilegious to me,” the frum user told us.

 Sarah, who has a famously sharp sense of humour, said she’d “love to see the self-service pet wash. Maybe that’s the miracle. Does the dog get a paw-friendly bottle of shampoo and do the washing all by itself, or are humans needed?”

As if that wasn’t enough mirth, she postulated: “Is the bark mitzvah age measured in dog years? Is this the moment they move from puppy to adult? I’m guessing this dog doesn’t shave?”

The company, called Beauty For The Beast, says it can meet all a pet-owner’s “Bark Mitzvah Needs” and even offers a “pet laundrette” service.

Their wares include Jewish dog toys, like a fluffy sheep doll with “BAA MITZVAH” embroidered on the side – and even kipot and talitot to suit all sizes of pet heads.

We circulated the advert to some other readers in the US and Jessica, another SA expat who attends a Chabad Shul in LA, replied: “Cute. We were at Shul on a Friday night a couple years ago and a woman came to say Kaddish for her dog who had recently died!”

Only in America…

3-Whacky - FULLy

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SA Jewish Report is looking for a journalist

The SA Jewish Report is looking for a journalist, who is passionate about and hungry for news and who writes both news and features beautifully.

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The applicant must to be tech savvy, comfortable online, on social media and in a newsroom. The applicant must have at least five years’ experience as a journalist and a relevant degree. Please forward your CV and an introductory letter to the editor, Peta Krost Maunder on editor@sajewishreport.co.za.  

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Apologies

On the wrong page at the wrong time

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The SA Jewish Report wishes to apologise to Dr Yossi Unterslak, a specialist gynaecologist and reproductive medicine assistant at Vitalab, whose face and title was in an advert on the page three of our Rosh Hashanah edition this week. The advert just happened to be on the same page as “Johannesburg doctor guilty of unprofessional conduct”. I wish to place it on record that Dr Unterslak was on that page advertising his participation in Torah Talks and has absolutely nothing to do with the story about the doctor on the page.  The SA Jewish Report apologises to Dr Unterslak for any harm or unpleasantness that derived from the advert being on this page.  – Editor

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Jewish Guild Orchestra reaches out through sweet sound of music

A musical tour around the world was presented to residents of Golden Acres, Sandringham Gardens and members of Second Innings last Sunday by the Jewish Guild Orchestra.

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MARGOT COHEN

Jewis Guild Orchestra

Professor Brian Buch who conducts the orchestra and is also its musical director, had his appreciative audience clamouring for more. The Jewish Guild Orchestra, although founded in 1944, has still been able to retain its fresh sound. It okays a wide range of light classical pieces and its repertoire last Sunday ranged from the operetta Gypsy Baron by Johan Strauss to the all-time Neapolitan favourite, O Sole Mio.

Expenses of the orchestra are met by its 35 members themselves; they derive no income from its activities. The orchestra was named after its original sponsor, the Johannesburg Jewish Guild which no longer exists. Its founder was the late Dr Solly Aronowsky who served as musical director for 46 years. Its current leader is Dr Bernard Caplan.

The orchestra provides support for amateur musicians, irrespective of race or religion, to develop their skills to perform in public and to enhance their appreciation of music. It also plays to audiences who would not otherwise have access to light classical music, such as residents of old aged homes, the Red Cross, Hospice and the Cancer Association.

“One of our objectives is to provide performances through which we are able to assist various charities or to promote music appreciation among scholars,” says Buch.

“We welcome new players,” says Buch. “We need female vocalists, string and brass players. We need players who are at grade 6 level.”

* For further information, contact Dr Buch on (012) 348-8653 or 071-633-0869

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