Appreciation? No thanks!

“The attitude of gratitude.” I hear this expression a lot. It certainly sounds good. It has a luring, alliterative lustre. And not only is it attractive to the ear, it appears to be appealing to the mind too. If one can train oneself to think in an appreciative way, one can tap into an admirable mindset of successful, happy, and virtuous living, or so the proponents of the attitude of gratitude purport.

But I beg to differ. A slightly altered alliterative expression is far more apt, meaningful, and accurate: “The platitude of gratitude.”

Ouch. That sounds harsh. A platitude isn’t desirable, to say the least. In my Google research on platitudes (Wikipedia) I found the following: “A platitude is even worse than a cliché. Not only old and overused, but often moralistic and imperious, and can lull us into accepting things that are actually false and foolish.”

What could possibly be so bad about gratitude? The answer isn’t complicated. Gratitude, far from being ideal, is a replacement for and displacement of greatness.

Let’s take the scenario of the parents who give their children a gift. “Say thank you,” they insist as the gift is handed over.

What values are the parents really instilling in their children by educating them to express appreciation? Is it a need for the parents to receive appreciation for their giving? Hopefully not! Is it then a need for the children to respond to receiving? Hopefully yes. But what is the nature of that response?

Surely the response parents truly want to instil in their children is their ability to make a positive difference, to be a blessing, to grow up to be mature and responsible contributors to society. Is merely saying thank you a contribution at all? Sadly, no.

The same applies to our relationship with our Father in Heaven. When He bestows on us all that He does, He certainly doesn’t do so out of a need to receive our appreciation. He does so wanting a response from us, not a dismissive response of “thank you”, but a mature response of using what He gives us to take responsibility.

Knowing this, it will come as no surprise that the correct translation of the Hebrew words “todah” and “modeh” isn’t “thanks” or “appreciation”. Instead, they are better translated as “affirm”. They are expressions of affirmation – the agreement to take what one has received and run with it.

When someone gives us something, the G-dly way to respond is, “We affirm that we will use what you have given us to be a blessing.” Not to trip up by saying, “Thank you.”

Speaking out against the attitude of gratitude is a thankless task, but it needs to be done. We need an alternative attitude to that of gratitude – the attitude of “greatitude” – affirmation that any good that we receive we’ll turn into greatness.